What Happens When They Won’t Accept Help?

Blog  |  September 22, 2015

When it comes time to surrender independence to assisted care, there can be conflict between a senior and their care givers/family. Often with trying to force a change, conflict can arise if the senior doesn’t acknowledge their deficits and accept help.

If you find yourself in a situation like this, here are some things to consider:

1.Imagine yourself in your loved one’s position if someone was telling you to leave your home. You would be scared at the thought of losing control and probably resist.

2.Don’t pull the “Power of Attorney” card. Bringing up a position of power is not going to decrease defenses. In fact, it will do the opposite.

3.Engage the services of professionals. Geriatric care managers or medical professionals can help to open up the communication and mediate the discussions between family members.

4.Don’t rush things. It takes time for people to accept their limitations and make changes in their lives. People need time to process changes and make adjustments in increments.

5.Start with small changes. Bring in help a few hours a week to give your loved one time to see that the assistance is valuable.

6.When possible, let your loved one decide that the time is right. All people do better with change when it was a change they initiated, not one that was forced upon them.

7.Look at options together. You may need to do the initial research on the options available for a move.

8.It is often a crisis, like a major fall or hospitalization that facilitates a change

If you find yourself in this challenging situation, enlist the support of friends, family, or a professional to guide you in navigating this difficult situation.

Blaine Bell, Owner – Belcare, dba Comfort Keepers serving The Georgian Triangle.

Contact: blainebell@comfortkeepers.ca or 705-293-5553 for free assessments of at-home care needs.

The material in this article is provided for informational purposes only, and is not meant as medical advice, diagnosis or treatment, or legal, financial or any other professional services advice.

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